This is a journal entry from when Sophia was still in the NICU. It was a very trying time for me. It took all the bravery I could muster. I hope this blog never seems melodramatic. My hope in sharing things like this is to shed light on my experience and to be real about my progress and the things that get me through (on this day it was simply learning to put one foot in front of the other).
Day 6 after my daughter's terminal diagnosis:
Sometimes in a dark wave of depression and sadness I feel incapable of anything. I feel incapable of operating a car. Or picking up after myself. I feel incapable of making a call about the insurance. I realized just now that feeling incapable and being incapable are different things. I may feel incapable of driving a car but I am NOT. I may just have to put one foot in front of the other, force my physical body to sit down, apply the break, and turn the key.
This is a blog about the joys of raising Sophia. It is intended to be REAL, inspiring, and shed light on the experience of having a terminal child. I hope that our experience will help people in one way or another. I could have never imagined having a terminal baby with special needs. The news was devastating. But there is joy in this journey. And life lessons to be learned. God knows us, individually, and he blesses each of of our lives daily. THIS, IS SOPHIA'S STORY...
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