Yesterday I gave Sophia a bath. Before I put all her "stuff" back on I tucked her feeding tube in (her outfit) and carried her outside. I showed her the tree Jason bought me for mothers day. I showed her my favorite flowers and enjoyed the diversity of our backyard. There was a slight breeze (good pretending weather) and for 5 minutes I just pretended. I pretended that she was healthy and that she wasn't going to die. I pretended that I really did get everything I ever wanted. I knew it wouldn't be healthy to stay in that place. But I allowed myself...for 5minutes....to just pretend. And then I had a good cry and went back to work 😇
This is a blog about the joys of raising Sophia. It is intended to be REAL, inspiring, and shed light on the experience of having a terminal child. I hope that our experience will help people in one way or another. I could have never imagined having a terminal baby with special needs. The news was devastating. But there is joy in this journey. And life lessons to be learned. God knows us, individually, and he blesses each of of our lives daily. THIS, IS SOPHIA'S STORY...
Sunday, May 7, 2017
Just Pretending
We like the show LOST. The main character, Jack, is a surgeon. Once he describes to Kate his first surgery. He was scared to do it and so for 10 seconds he lets the fear in. He let himself be afraid for 10 seconds....and then he lets go of the fear and goes to work.
Yesterday I gave Sophia a bath. Before I put all her "stuff" back on I tucked her feeding tube in (her outfit) and carried her outside. I showed her the tree Jason bought me for mothers day. I showed her my favorite flowers and enjoyed the diversity of our backyard. There was a slight breeze (good pretending weather) and for 5 minutes I just pretended. I pretended that she was healthy and that she wasn't going to die. I pretended that I really did get everything I ever wanted. I knew it wouldn't be healthy to stay in that place. But I allowed myself...for 5minutes....to just pretend. And then I had a good cry and went back to work 😇
Yesterday I gave Sophia a bath. Before I put all her "stuff" back on I tucked her feeding tube in (her outfit) and carried her outside. I showed her the tree Jason bought me for mothers day. I showed her my favorite flowers and enjoyed the diversity of our backyard. There was a slight breeze (good pretending weather) and for 5 minutes I just pretended. I pretended that she was healthy and that she wasn't going to die. I pretended that I really did get everything I ever wanted. I knew it wouldn't be healthy to stay in that place. But I allowed myself...for 5minutes....to just pretend. And then I had a good cry and went back to work 😇
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